ODE on England’s Famous Crickety Victory

ODE on Englands Famous Victory over Australia in Cricket

Australia has been beaten: Australia has been thrashed
Australia’s checks bounce at the bank because Australia’s checks have been cashed
By old England’s ancient Side saying Oh play up, do
Thereby in the old-fashioned cricket way causing Australia no end of Rue.

Australia has been out batted, out-bowled, outran and outplayed
By England for the first time since Thatcher last got laid!
Australia cried this is a sticky wicket
Get us a bucket for we shall needs be sick in it.

There is no joy in Brisbane, nor in Hobart, nor in all of Oz
There is no joy in Bolivia, amongst the small expatriate Aussie community that is centered on La Paz
There is sorrow in Melbourne and Perth will not be consoled
And the universal cry is, “oh, ’twas not well bowled”.

There is Schadenfreude in London, and in Manchester there is joy
The Queen has been said to smile, and say, “Andrew Strauss, he’s me boy”
Prince Charles no longer snarls, and Edinburgh is glad
The publicans in the public houses say, Pietersen’s the Lad.

But give those Australians some giant cans of Foster’s Premium Lager
Tho’ it be cold, and when decanted the color of pissy water,
Let them heft a few, and after many a foamish Brew
I’m sure they will hoist one to the Victorious England Crew.

Rule, Britannia, Britannia rules the “saves” (?)
For Britons never never never shall be Slaves.

Edward G. Nilges 7 Jan 2011. Moral Rights have been asserted, mate.


Stun me if I could find a single cute girl in a bikini decorated with England’s cross of St. George. I did find a hairy bloke with a Belly in said attire, but that was rather disgusting.

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