Queen Mary Hospital 10 August 2012

Anselm Kiefer, Der Ordnung der Engel: The Hierarchy of Angels

CT scan and a GI tract followup based on my June hospitalization for abdominal pain. The latter no problem since the hospitalization was caused by my being stupid about taking Ibuprofen. Received my PET scan images, not going to examine them since I don’t really know how to interpret them. Furthermore, they look like a bunch of cutlets of Me which is disturbingly culinary.

The eye-of-God Bone Scan early in this crisis and to an extent the expensive Pet scan, were rather frightening. Today had a little more sang-froid for I separate getting the interpreted results from the manufacture of the results. I did tell a small lie since I wanted to get this CT scan done: I said I’d had breakfast before six but it was more towards seven. If the doctor confuses kidney bean curry and brown bread with a new metastasis one shall have to be Calm and ask him if it might be Food. It is very important as an outpatient to follow all directions as much as possible, for the alternative is an expensive hospital stay when you’re a goofball, and cannot follow directions in writing. I’d done so, but not on the meal timing.

Never thought I’d welcome a weight gain but found at Queen Mary today that I’ve gained seven pounds. Old weight was 158 pounds or 71.7 kg two weeks ago. It’s 74.9 kg and 165 pounds today but I’m still underweight: IDEAL male weight for my height (6’2″) is 175 but AVERAGE in USA is 230 pounds (wow that’s some serious meat on de hoof, Jackson).

I think I was down a quart even before La Debacle (May’s diagnosis of prostate cancer) since I’d adopted a program of eating less after the Pret a Manger closed in the AIA building on Hysan Avenue as a result of the Panic of 2008. Then, after the bad news, continued exercise, somewhat increased out of sheer panic in itself, coupled with a bungled transition to vegetarianism, caused a dramatic weight loss, negative love handles, and serious but unhealthy Hotness as we have seen here ha ha.

Let’s just get it back up to normal by careful diet that will but emphasize the rabbit food and roughage but also contain some meat and dairy. I simply do not know how to eat a completely vegetarian diet.

I see a Dan Ryan’s Chicago Grill Snarfburger in my future with a side of fries slathered in mustard as a special treat and I’m buying. I don’t think I’m on my way to 230 pounds but in my day I weighed 205 which was, according to my very svelte Manhattan doctor, “borderline obese”. He put me in Jenny Craig in 1990 and it was kind of fun. I learned some good eating habits and dropped down to 185.

The message of Beethoven’s Heilige Dangkesang im Lydischen Tonart is that a disease is the new normal and the good days are better than the bad days are bad as long as you note then and say, as did Beethoven apparently, like Wayne Newton, Dangke Schon.

The swimming once again reducing pain while walking so in general was full of beans this afternoon, so many indeed that I was concerned whether I was manufacturing too much testosterone and thereby overwhelming the Bette Davis drug (Flutamide). Found a USB/MIDI interface at a computer store on Des Voeux which the sales clerk was unable to find so got them to reduce the price in Hong Kong style. I need a usb midi so as to be able to inflict my proto New Age improvisations from 1972 on this blog and its loyal if long suffering fans once I am up to speed.

It’s wonderful to have a piano in my flat even if this is one of those little Yamaha jobs.

As in German artist Anselm Kiefer’s meditations on his childhood circa 1945, a Jahr Null (year zero) creates the “normal”.

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