Popeye Cometh Out of the Closet, an Original Balade

The Balade of Gay Popeye

I’m Popeye the sailor man
I no longer eat out of a can
Bluto prepares for me
A wonderful Spinach Fettucine
And we share a Chateau Lafitte
And under the table do meet
Our well manicured metrosexual feet
Oh it’s so much fun now to be so effete!
One of these days and I hope it is soon
A Homo child we’ll have developed by black arts on a secret place on the Moon
Confirming Mitt Romney’s fear,
That if enough of us turn queer,
God or the Devil with not with us make Remonstrancy,
But instead alter biology allowing that unspeakable Horror: male pregnancy!

it seems so long ago and yet just yesterday
Before either of us admitted we’re gay.
And we both lived on stinking boats
With stack gas and dead billy goats,
And fought over Miss Olive Oyl,
For her bony ass made our blood, to so boil.
But now she’s set up housekeeping
With Bettry Boop she is sleeping
And Bluto and I are so happy
He makes me feel all girly and slappy!
I am what I am and that’s what I am
I’m Popeye the Gay Sailor Man!! Toot Toot!!

Edward G. Nilges 20 August 2012. Copyright 2012 by Edward G. Nilges. Moral rights have been asserted, so don’t “get gay” with me, that is, don’t mess with my intleckshul property!.

Edward G Nilges


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