Archive for Workout

20 Oct 2013: Stayin’ Alive

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , on October 20, 2013 by spinoza1111

Fell into a semi-coma for a day or so, backup, “stayin’ alive” in the ruins. Will try to resume the daily workout today with ten min on the stairs today, back to morning workouts tomorrow. These seances  due, perhaps, to simple exhaustion.

Awoke to pain following the usual Sciatic Highway but it is under control, as far as it shall be.

The extraordinarily clumsy input method, where 10% of characters entered have me throwing my arm across my torso to reach an alternative, is like trying to hack one’s way thru the swamp like Indiana Jones.

When in 1983 old Peter (junglee Peter!) discovered that he could swing from my arm he did so as if he was Indiana Jones!!!, yelling the eponymous yell as Peter (junglee Peter!) did so.

It’s official, and rather discouraging. Some possible internal fracturing may have been found as the cancer spreads. Studying how this works since more and more is learned and staging changes. Ignoring “life expectancy” estimates since these are so unscientific and I have done  what viatical things have needed to be done. 

Boots on the table with this thing, pain, since Dr. wants me not to disturb the others In this more communal society. TM (transcendental meditation) works. Even for a neophyte like me it works. But, of course, with medication.

But wait, more than a year with time for friends, money just enough, just enough, for the city? Things as always swell.

More later.

“What a Gift, a Window”

What a gift, a window.
Giving on to something unwilled
But magnificent in its own way,
Promising the more in its own way as the Flight to Egypt shows
Mary, with modest downcast eyes, led by

Edward G. Nilges: Copyright 20 Oct 2013: Moral rights asserted


16 Oct 2013

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , on October 16, 2013 by spinoza1111

Similar day to Tue Oct 15: painful, 20 minutes: 100 midrise steps, walking, 150 supine warmup w/w-o weights. Moderate pain.

Had to go to Queen Mary later for bone scan : more later. Weariness. I will post more extensively tomorrow.

The glorious-furious drive up the North Shore is memory key. Getting Eddie’s favorite foods, for he was Daddy’s Favorite well as well.

Death-tired, listening to Brahms.

15 Oct 2013

Posted in Uncategorized with tags on October 16, 2013 by spinoza1111

20 minutes: 100 midrise steps, walking, 150 supine warmup w/w-o weights. Moderate pain.

14 Oct 2013

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , on October 14, 2013 by spinoza1111

First-thing 20 minute workout: 100 lowrise steps, 250 supine movements included some with weights.

Study of Johansen’s Ancient Philosophy moves apace and with profit into Roman philosophy which might well be summarized as Philosophy for Badasses with its emphasis on the backup role of women and the need for loyalty.

A day like a weekend for it’s a public holiday, this may have caused my “weekender” pain (10/10+) to explode earlier today altho now, with painkillahs at savage levels while earlier, “God’s vassals dropped and died” whilst the Sciatica river ran red with blood I prayed for and got surcease.

13 Oct 2013

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , on October 13, 2013 by spinoza1111

First-thing workout at 6:04: 20 minutes included 150 supine movements with weights, walking, 100 midrise steps (steps in stairwell, not lowrise steps in ward), and 50 slow dancing with walking stick (the old soft shoe: acceptable pain accompanied this return to the OSS.)

Notes on  a Pain Episode

For unknown reason, on the last few weekends, especially Sundays, I have had intense bouts of direct and referred pain; I think it was last Sunday when I first crossed “the screaming barrier”, bothering the other patients.

However, today I was able to endure 10/10+ pain in my butt and was able to practise Acceptance instead of “exclaiming”:  for as Lovel admonishes Hastings i’th’old play (Richard III), “Come, come, dispatch; ’tis bootless to exclaim.”

Notes on the Incomprehensible War

Some heroes included Sgt. “Breathless”. The Kid said, gee, Sarge, it hurts to breathe”. Sgt. Breathless. eyes scanning the dark, said, “so don’t breathe.” So the Kid figured that that meant finding a way to breathe at  a low level, more through his skin almost. So the Kid did this, and survived.

There was also Sgt. Rock who kept firing with his ass shot off. When the position, still held by his men and a dead Sgt. Rock, was relieved, the commander of the relief troops collected his leather belt bitten clean thru because the Sarge was busy killing Cheeseballs whilst in pain. This gruesome artifact hangs today in the Incomprehensible Museum.

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10 Oct 2010

Posted in Uncategorized with tags on October 10, 2013 by spinoza1111

Still resting from overdoing “it” on Sunday, worked out once (20 min: physio on rackety row machine) today. Filled with disgust and despair and even an unwilling hatred of my fellow man: why do mainlanders feel they have to waste both towels and water when towels and water are free? The very sound of a mainlander wasting water fills me with horror and distaste.

No workout 7 or 8 Oct because of a keyboard failure that I now work-around using a tedious and painful special procedure, the tedium compounded by mental confusion. My brain swirls in pain caused mostly by family issues and uncharity but also this universal heartlessness of a raging culture of celebrity and money its vortex catching even its professed critics.

7 Oct 2013: I get no kick from cocaine?

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , on October 7, 2013 by spinoza1111

No workout at all today for the first no-workout day in months because of last night’s pain which was a multiple of the intensity of the intensity of the night before.  Saturday night’s pain was really bad, and I now know this to be because of my walking workout in which I was secretly and pridefully trying to get back to the Garden (running), for last night’s (Sunday night’s) pain was very intense and easily a ten over ten…perhaps it smashed the barometer.

This was a typical experience in running where when I ignored pain, I’d suffer intensely. The obvious “cure” is not to walk or run at this level of intensity and at this duration at least not for now.

“I bring you suffering: I bring you the release from suffering” – Buddha

The pain was alleviated at last by stilnox and fentanyl which like the smart little guy with the big hammer ten times his size knocked me out. But before that the extraordinary agony (no, don’t italicize it, Chuckles, it ain’t a Greek word) had confronted Saturday night’s prideful claim that I could overcome pain, even tho’ I shied away from that claim, knowing it to be pride, and Pride is “a stick of shitfire with a wick on it”.

But in the agony there was me, a wondering me still, wondering how I could be still there…choral dance in the style of Sophocles:

In the agon there was … me
Dancing amidst the Furies I defied them
But also tempted them to do their worst.
Man proud man must thereby discover his own limits,
For he has said

(Aside, no, “not before he’s dead”, I want no jinglee rhyme this time)

Oh, OK, you can sneak that line in:
But this is noble verse “high and working”, and a combat not of bells,
But of hammers as we strike each other as Hector and Achilles,
Or Palamon and Arcite
In final battle, like the government shutdown.

But my reward for what patience I “shown”, to use the grammar of Pittsburgh Dad who “seen” a tornado in this agon:  was Suffering and then, reciprocal to suffering, this morning’s Buddhist Release from Suffering: “I bring you Suffering” is not just accidentally linked to “I bring you Release”.

It’s a Mystery, as Hemyngs says in “Shakespeare in Love”. Pittsburgh Dad, rather like Homer Simpson, is, qua Dad, the locus of what’s so airily dismissed as patriarchal culture. He seen the storm, he seen Hypolyte being destroyed by the monster I’th’old play (Phèdre). Mother tries to comfort but my Dad told me when I was in the hospital that I needed to be “patient” like a “patient” in a pun of some wisdom tho’ pretty lame.

Since in a chart based on an Excel spreadsheet as a teacher, I discovered some Great Learning as opposed to Trivial Pursuit (“the participle like ‘seen’ or ‘shown’ is always preceded by a helper verb in the ‘have’ family”) I could immediately spot, and more helpfully explain, blunders like that of Pittsburgh Dad. For the student wants Great Learning such as was in my table in which I combined all possibilities of grammar forms in a verb phrase.

I won’t post the table right now because I’m like the mathematician I met at Princeton (damn right I name drop), John Horton Conway who in a seminar at Princeton’s short-lived “John von Neumann Center” (damn right! How do ya like me now!?) Conway said he never liked to search for the paperwork of a proof he’d constructed; it was easier and more fun for him to do the proof again, and, he could spot errors and make improvements! Even as I preferred to rewrite software tools (considered as “lemmas” on the way to a desired theorem) than locate them in a mess or worse use some other person’s idiot idea of the proof unless she was a Knuth, John Nash, Brian Kernighan or Melinda Varian (where Donald Knuth or the three Princeton personalities I mention were excellent sources of software tools and references to tools; John Nash arguably the least “user friendly” but displayed a clear grasp of the notions as early as the early 1950s, which was amazing.)

I have to put the To-Do note “reconstruct and post the verb phrase grammar chart” on top of the wobbly “stacka stuff I gotta do” hopin’ it don’t collapse (to continue, briefly, in “Pittsburgh Dad” style) but trust me I find such activity fun and even analgesic. For “I get no kick in a plane, flying real high with some guy in the sky is my idea of nothing to do”.